That One Friend

How many friends do you have? No, really. How many friends do you have? Not your Twitter nor your Facebook friends. How many of them? 100? 200? How many of them are there whenever you need them?

The person you think is your friend will be there for you at any time of the day. However, if he/she is not the one whom you can call whenever you feel like, that person isn't your friend. If the person misunderstands you when you need him/her the most, then clearly that person isn't your friend. If that person calls you only on your birthday, that person isn't your friend.

Well, now that we are done with some sifting, how many friends do you have now?

About 50? Great!

What about true friends? How many true friends do you have in your life? Rather, let me put it this way, how many best friends do you have? Those who know your deepest darkest fears, those who know when you are sad, even when you don't even know it yourself? 

That's the friend you need to have!

That one friend would fight for you, even when you have lost all your hope. That one friend would be the sunshine you'd seek in your darkest days, ready to make you smile whenever you least expect. That one friend would be the song you'd sing while walking down the seashore. That one friend would be highest high, but never the lowest low.

All throughout our childhood, we used to boast about the number of friends that we had. However, as we grew up, it's the quality that mattered, not the quantity. Having 1836 friends in your phone isn't something that you'd boast about now. It's the handful, or less, folks who call you time and again that really make the difference. 

A best friend is like the song you'd like to hum when you are dancing in the rain. That one friend is like a freshly brewed coffee on a winter morning. Just what you need.

All you need is that one friend to hear you out, even without uttering it. Just the two of you walking and letting the walk speak for itself.

We all drop in and out of relationships  but at the end of the day, we are all searching for that one friend in that relationship. May be that spouse, may be that lover. The world will be jealous of you two. The world will try to break you apart. A seemingly innocuous fault from either of the two of you can/will be poked until the relationship bleeds.

But that true friend won't cry of pain, won't cry of hurt. He/she will let you take the important call. Friendships break too. If you have lost a friend of years, I am so sorry for you. But remember, you are not alone. 

I had a best friend. Long curly hair, big round eyes, with dimples on her left cheek and her sharp nose. Defines the perfect-girl-next-door-look. In her black bindi and her hair plaited to two, she'd smile all her way to school. A bubbly character, loving and soft spoken. My first best friend, whom I lost to cancer. She was 14 when she returned to God Almighty. Her family kept the news away from her. All I knew, she passed out at school and that's when I came to know she was diagnosed with blood cancer. Days wouldn't pass without her. We'd talk about everything. She was more like a long lost sister. Unfortunately. as I write this out with memories of us together flashing in my mind, she is no where around. 26th of April 2012. It might be a mere date to others. To me, this is the day I lost my other half. It has been 3 years since she left us. Living life with the memories I lived with her. Each time I break down for any reason, I remind myself of this strong girl I lived with. She told me once, " If anyone breaks your heart, I'll be there to skin them alive. And if anyone breaks my heart, I want you to do the same." I wish I still had the chance to do that for her. 

I'll have my tears flowing each time I think of her.  No one could sense that something was wrong with me yesterday, except for mum. If my girl was around, she'd know it in a look. But I guess God needed an angel, so He took her earlier. I'm pretty sure an angel like her is kept safe right up there.

There are far too many less fortunate ones who haven't had the chance to feel the joys of friendship. 

What are the joys of friendship? It's not in going to expensive pubs and discs but in sharing a warm cup from that stall down the road. It's not in showing off each other's stuff but in sharing your stuffs happily. 

It's about hitting the road and not looking back. Friendships, as they say, is a wonderful feeling. 

And that one friend, is love personified. In remembrance of my Manu, May her soul rest in peace.  

Why Do We Blog?

Why Do We Blog??

Yea yea, I know, I blog too. And this question is something that has been on my mind for quite some time now. Why do I blog? Why do I write? There are so many bloggers across the internet – why do they blog? What differentiates one blog from another? Does anyone read my blog? More importantly, who would want to read my blog? Is it true? Whatever people write – is everything true and really heartfelt? Does this mean that each one of us bloggers are these super-right people who never have any negative feelings? Is it possible? If not, then where is the honesty on the blog? Why don’t those negative feelings come out?

Can’t answer for other people, but I can explain my case. Well, writing has always been an integral part of my life. In school, I used to write articles for the school magazine. I used to give my contributions to the annual magazine. With the advent of the internet, I started providing my inputs for the school website. I used to write my articles for state level competitions, representing my school. The best thing about my language papers for me was my essays. I used to love writing on an unknown subject which I had not pre-rehearsed.

I wish  I got into a profession about writing. But, for some time, my creative writing took a back seat as there was no website, magazine of my new place to which I made any contributions. And, then once I accidently stumbled upon someone’s BLOG. Interesting, I thought. I got lost in the immense stream of words, article after article. I loved reading people’s experiences, innermost feelings about worldly topics. These thoughts were not present in any book, online or any magazine. They were unique and yet, there was this connection with the feelings. Then, after I went about reading other blogs, I realised that true human feelings were not published in books and novels – they were on blogs. And then, I remembered my own articles and how I used to bring out human aspects to normal school events in my articles. It was at this time, I fell in love with blogging and I started my own blog.

I realised that it is a journey. When you start writing an article on your blog, you have no idea where it is going and which way it is going to turn. You just think of something, and start writing. Words just come into your mind and there is no clue when they are going to stop. It slowly becomes a thrill ride and before you know, paragraphs have been written. You then realise, that there was one sentence in your mind when you started, and then slowly once you emptied the sentence from your mind onto the paper, more and more words were formed.

I think that blogs are for opinionated people. They have opinions on almost everything and hence they write. About not writing bad feelings, well, do we ever tell a person that this is what we dislike? We don’t, do we? Even though it is in our minds. It is not cheating, it is pure good behaviour. Honesty doesn’t mean foolishness, does it? Same goes with blogging. We might not feel good about many things, but we gotta adhere to good civilized behaviour. That explains the absence of bad feelings on blogs. It is not dishonesty. We live in a society and we gotta stick to some rules.

About honesty, I never lie on my blog. I think that to lie on one’s blog is to lie to one’s soul. I don’t think that anyone lies on their blog. It is like your soul – just that the format is in words.

I used to put up what I read in Tumblr on my blog. Then I realized that it's not my work and second of all, I'm cheating no one but myself. I removed all the post I took copied from Tumblr and began writing my own. I had no intention of copying but I even failed to put up a "courtesy of Tumblr.." at the end of the post. So...

So yeah, I blog because I love to see my thoughts take shape into words. I read blogs because I love to see how human mind thinks and how easy it is to connect with another human emotion.

And sometimes, I also think that we bloggers have no work and hence all we do it write!  Did I just write your thoughts? No, I don’t think that blogging is for lonely people. It is for people who love the idea of writing and have opinions. It is as simple as that. If it was for lonely people, we would be living in a very scary world with more than half of the world writing. Eeeks – scary isn't it?

Maybe, writing is an in-born thing. Internet is a man-made thing. Maybe, Blogging is the result of what happens when an in-born quality meets a man-made invention.

Cheers to the all bloggers I've came across. And a double cheers to them, the bloggers that encouraged my blogging journey. The first person who brought me back into creative writing,  S-kay The Phantom, That one person I can relate everything from food,family, religion and passion, Nia's Ravishing Voyage and the very inspiring Sukhbir's Remedy of Dramedies whom impressed me with his style of writing.

Bonne journée! Amitiés, Lyana..

Acknowledgement Doesn't Hurt

You know what beats me?The fact that the society today is getting more and more ignorant, shallow and unthoughtful. We look down on others. Others who are not as privileged, rich or lucky like we are. Now, I'm not saying that I don't do this sometimes. I also have the tendency to forget what I would normally not do or the least, forbid myself not to do. I am human and humans forget sometimes.

Everyday, we ignore those who seem insignificant to us, those who we presume are not worthy or not important. Like garbage collectors, or waiters. We forget to say thank you or offer a smile to them because in our minds, they simply do not matter at all. Its as if they are invisible or transparent because our eyes don't see what they don't want to see. But what we don't seem to understand is that they indeed ARE important to us, they are important to our society.

Time and again, we descriminate against people who are different than us. But has it ever crossed our minds that without different people, it makes our world extremely boring, dull and undiverse? Then, everyone would be the same. This way, everyone would have the same job, everyone has the same personality and religion. Everyone will be the same. Has it ever crossed our minds that without dissimilar humans, there wouldn't be anybody to sweep the roads or to collect trash from our houses? God created every person for a reason. Everyone plays a role in ensuring that a balanced, beautiful world exists.

Everyone is important, regardless if you're a maid or a construction worker. So the next time you pass by your school janitor, offer him/her a smile. After all, a smile costs nothing but worths everything. You might just make their day by them knowing that they are appreciated for their effort poured into making your school a cleaner place. Perhaps,you could say thank you to your waiter next time he brings you your bill. He did, after all serve you your coffee.

My point is, acknowledge those who aren't as fortunate as you. You never know, you might be in their shoes one day, craving for that scarce bit of acknowlegement that people rarely grant you.

Are Regrets Necessary?

You slogged it out in the office. You have had a tough day. All you are looking forward to is may be a bath and then hitting the sack. You suffer through the traffic, get back home, talk to a few people on your way back over the phone, your fingers itching to hit the disconnect button. You loosen the buttons, wipe off the early summer sweat and finally hit the doorbell. The final flight of stairs seem like a challenge too magnamious. Yet, you walk on. You are irritated with "life". The frustration shows up in the way you untie, unbutton, unzip. You are only minutes away from hitting the shower knob.

You thought to sit down for a minute to cool off. That's exactly when the world of "What if" hits you. That world is a deep, mysterious place where time ceases to exist. Wherever you are, you are seamingly pushed into that world. May be it was because of someone posting about something that you couldn't become. You begin thinking. What if you had a bit more money to begin with. what if you had a better job? What if you pursued your dreams instead of giving in to your mom and dad? The closed room is stifling your thoughts. You look up.

You forgot to turn on the fan. Heck you even forgot to turn on the lights. Wiping the sweat from your neck, you drag yourself to the window and open it. The warm gust disappoints you. Again. You turn on the lights, switch on the fan, look around. Searching for nothing, yet looking. You sit down again.

Somehow, the world of "What If" made you smile, helped you get away from everything. Someone calls you from outside. You don't even get the time to yourself. You get up and rush through the chores and hit the dinner table. Few awkward moments later, you are back to your room, checking your mail, Facebook and Twitter. You feel tired. You shut the PC. You hit the bed. That's when sleeps leaves you.

People who talk endlessly about living with zero regrets or having none to begin with, are probably shitting themselves outright. Regrets are a necessary evil. When you have regrets, you work consciously towards ensuring you don't screw up further. However, too much delving into your past, into the world of "What Ifs" may be detrimental to your sanity! To be honest, we never really learn from the first mistake, nor the second or even the third. It only hits us when we are given the last chance. So, there is totally no points of regretting over anything.

I personally choose to not regret anything I've done, because at one point of life, that was exactly what I wanted to do. “We should all start to live before we get too old. Fear is stupid. So are regrets.” - Marilyn Monroe

Relax. Calm down and chill! You can never screw yourself that badly. Life always gives you chances to bounce back, achieve something nobody expected you to. Find something that you truly enjoy and stick with it. If you had to give up your dream, then one way to quit regretting is by planning. When you plan, you actually boost your chances to quit the life that you are surviving and get the life that you'd truly LIVE. Remember, you are your own personal hero. Cheers!

Signing off, Lyana.